At the end of reading periods I have a student give a book talk on a novel they're enjoying. It's a wonderful way to get 7th graders excited about reading. Today, a child presented a book who's protagonist suffers from ADHD. Two students raised their hand, connecting with the main character's disability. Though I've had a lot of experience with students with attention deficit disorder, none of them have ever spoken out on how it effects their lives. The girl explained that when she takes her medicine she feels grumpy and quiet. When she doesn't she can't control her actions and feels like jumping instead of walking. The boy who raised his hand said he felt the same. The medicine made him lose his appetite and put him in a bad mood. But without it, he felt like he couldn't concentrate.
A bright light was cast into my classroom: It's so easy to get irritated by students who can't focus or concentrate. However, it's vital to remember the challenges they face day in and out.
I went home after work, made a delicious dinner (read my recipe post!), did a little grading and then went to Yoga. Every time I'm asked to clear my mind and focus on my breathing, on the present, I feel a lot like my students. My brain begins to clutter with wasteful thoughts: did I pay that bill on time? how am I going to afford all these weddings? I'm hungry... I try my hardest to breathe them out. I try to do as my yoga instructor advices-- acknowledge the thoughts as fleeting, and just let go. However, the harder I attempt to release, the harder my thoughts cling to my brain, force their way in and attempt to take over.
I try simple things, like reminding myself that this hour is for me and no one else. That those thoughts are useless-- I obviously can't pay a bill while folded into downward dog. But these day dreams are strong, stronger than my will to silence them. And sometimes the only way to let the thoughts go is to let them win.
Keep breathing.
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